NBA Baffled Why No One Wants To Watch Millionaire Athletes Disrespect The Country That Gave Them Everything They Have [Satire]

“NBA Commissioner Will Fully-Blind said he was stymied by the ratings drop.

Commissioner Fully-Blind said he was shocked that even the audience for the Lakers games featuring LeBron James now largely consisted of the cardboard cutouts of human beings placed in the stands, many of whom left early in order to beat the cardboard traffic back to their cardboard homes.

Another 178 people were also watching the games on TV, but they were also cardboard.”

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